


Who You Were

by ArtjuiceRP



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, post-Revelations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-17
Updated: 2016-01-17
Packaged: 2018-05-14 09:38:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5738710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArtjuiceRP/pseuds/ArtjuiceRP
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Whoever you were doesn’t matter to me and it shouldn’t matter to you. The woman I see now is a remarkable person and I’m honoured to be here with her.” Blackwall had told Tosia Cadash that once. Now she has a chance to say it back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Who You Were

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Hawkeye733 for reading this through!

The laceration down Tosia’s side still ached, was still an angry red, even though it had been days since the dragon’s tail had knocked her aside. She hadn’t even glanced at it since Cassandra had pulled her away from the Vinsomer’s corpse, applied a poultice and then wrapped a bandage around her torso. She hadn’t wanted to take the time, not when she knew Leliana had delivered Blackwall back to Skyhold.

Or should she call him Rainier now? Thom?

No matter how many hours she dwelt on everything that had happened, it still felt strange to know him as anyone other than Blackwall. That had been the name she cried as he moved over her, pressed her into the hay, except it wasn’t his name at all.

At least someone, probably Josephine, had organised for a hot bath to be made up in her quarters. She stripped off her clothes, unwrapped the bandage and sank into the steaming water, ignoring the biting sting of the wound.

It hadn’t been the easiest day, although she was growing used to that.

“You’re hurt.”

“And you’re here.” Tosia hadn’t even opened her eyes, she didn’t need to. “This seems familiar.”

He chuckled, the sound short and deep. Tosia opened her eyes only when she heard him take a step towards her, moving from the balcony into the large room. “I had to see you.”

Tosia sighed, a slightly mischievous smile curving her lips as she stood from the tub, water sluicing over her. She padded across the room to her robe and wrapped it around her, feeling Blackwall’s eyes on her as she moved.

“You’ve seen me.” She told him, and although he seemed slightly amused, she could see concern in his eyes, his stare locked on where her injury was.

“What happened?”

“I needed to hit something.” Tosia told him. “I didn’t think Solas would like another punch to the face, so I took Sera and Vivienne to deal with those Templars on the coast. Then we found a dragon.” Blackwall grimaced and moved even closer, bending slightly so that he could reach out and press his hand against her side, the touch warm even through the fabric of her robe. Tosia inhaled sharply at the contact, something she hadn’t prepared to feel so soon after everything. “Why are you here?”

“That’s what I came to ask you. I want to know why I’m still here.” He said roughly. “Why did you set me free?”

“You already asked me that.”

“You didn’t answer.” Blackwall muttered. “You told me I was free to atone. You told me you were willing to give us a chance, but you never explained.”

Of course she hadn’t. Not with the audience she’d had as she judged him, as he stepped up the stairs to the throne and bent to kiss her.

“Sit down.” She ordered, gesturing towards her bed. Blackwall did as she asked, their heads the same level once he was perched on the edge of her bed. “Look, Blackwall… Thom. It’s not as though my past is something to be proud of. I never hid that I was in the Carta, but I don’t talk about it. I’ve never faced up to it, not the way you did.”

Blackwall went to speak, but faltered when Tosia stepped closer, resting her hands on his shoulders and keeping his gaze locked on her.

“The Maker gave me a second chance.” She told him. “How could I give you anything else? I considered sending you to the Wardens, you know? So that you could become the man that the real Blackwall believed you could be.”

“But you didn’t.”

“I couldn’t.” Tosia admitted, allowing one hand to trail up from his shoulder and tangle in his beard. “As much as you admire them, as much as  _ I  _ admire them, only Alistair seemed to fit the stories you told me. Everything else I’ve seen with the Wardens has led to death or disgrace and I don’t want that for you. I want you here. With me.”

“But you set me free.” Blackwall told her. “If I want to join the Grey Wardens, is it not up to me?”

“It is.” Tosia answered. “But it wasn’t a choice I could force on you. Not after Adamant.”

“You truly want me here?”

“I do.” Tosia insisted. “I love you. Whatever your name is.”

“You don’t know me.” Blackwall rumbled. “I don’t know how to let you know me.”

Tosia swallowed, her fingers curling into the thick hair of his beard. “I think we just need time for that.” She suggested. “Besides, I  _ do  _ know you. I might not know your past, but I know the man you are now. The man you try to be.” She inched closer, remembering words that he’d once said to her, words that had meant  _ so much _ . “Whoever you were doesn’t matter to me and it shouldn’t matter to you. The man I see now is a remarkable person and I’m honoured to be here with him.”

Blackwall swallowed, his large hands finally rising to cup her face in his hands. He looked as touched as she’d felt when he’d said the same thing to her, and she pressed her lips to his, clambering into his lap. She smiled against him when he groaned and clutched at her waist, kissed her just a bit harder.

“And I would be even  _ more _ honoured if he would let me know the real Thom.” She whispered, drawing back an inch so that she could meet his gaze and show him how sincere she was. “Will you?”

“I’m going to try.”

“Then I know where we can start.” She reached for the front of his jacket and pulled his face towards hers, pressing their lips together before he could say another word.


End file.
